The Nervous System After Prolonged Stress

Thinking about stress, the first things that come to mind are usually ones that are external. It can be work, caring responsibilities, a feeling of uncertainty, conflict with others, overwhelming emotions... But stress doesn't only happen around us, it also takes place inside us, within our nervous system, in ourselves and in the ways we find to keep ourselves safe and to cope.

If the stress we experienced has been a short-lived one, then our nervous system usually can find its way back into a state of balance. But once it becomes prolonged (and prolonged stress is subjective to each and every one of us, it can be a week, months or years), then our system adapts. It takes on different operating modes, it does whatever it can to keep us going.

A system designed for survival

The entire nervous system’s job is to keep us safe. It is busy, constantly scanning for threats, even when we’re not aware of it and everything seems safe. Whenever it senses some kind of danger, be it physical, emotional, relational, or even one that we imagine might be present somewhere, our nervous system immediately shifts into one of its survival states:

• fight (mobilising to confront)

• flight (mobilising to escape)

• freeze (shutting down to conserve energy)

• fawn (appeasing to reduce threat)

The above responses are automatic ones. They’re not a choice that we decide to make. Just like the fire alarm doesn't decide whether to sound if the smoke detector senses smoke, no matter if it's a real fire or a burned dish. Those responses are built into us so that we can survive.

What happens when we find ourselves in a situation of prolonged stress is that the nervous system can either get stuck in one of these states, or move very rapidly between them.

Living in "on" and "off" modes

For many of us, living in prolonged stress means that our nervous system is constantly switched on, staying in a state of high alert. This can take many forms, it can mean that we have difficulty relaxing, we feel "on edge" all the time, we are irritable or experience racing thoughts. It gives us that sense of being constantly braced for danger. This is our nervous system staying on so that we can cope with what we're facing.

On the other hand, some of us may, after prolonged stress, may experience shutdown. This is a sign that our nervous system has been overwhelmed for too long and needs to conserve energy because it feels depleted. It can manifest itself through an emotional numbness, low energy levels, difficulties with concentration, a feeling of disconnection from others, or a sense that we are going through our life on autopilot.

Hidden in plain sight

Another thing that may sometimes happen, is that we tend to feel somatic signals of prolonged stress before our mind recognises them as such. We may notice repeated headaches, digestive issues, feelings of tension, disrupted sleep and others. Those can be signals indicating that we have been operating in a survival mode for longer that we can comfortably sustain.

Furthermore, when our nervous system experiences prolonged stress, our capacity in its different forms (emotional, physical, cognitive) reduces itself naturally. The experience that we have is that things that we once managed without issue begin to feel overwhelming. Even small decisions can take a lot more energy. We can have trouble interacting with others. And as our nervous system has been working for a long time, the threshold for experiencing stress becomes steadily lower.

Why it can be hard to rest

We can often wonder why, even after the stressful situation has passed, we still cannot switch off, rest or "calm ourselves". But this assumes that our nervous system operates on a logical, cognitive level. It actually uses patterns that have worked before, ones that teach it that it needs to be always vigilant, and therefore it won't immediately believe that the environment is safe. The shift will require time, consistency and many signals that we are safe before we are able to shift.

You may read some more about it here: Why Rest Feels Difficult

A sign that we are human

Once we begin to notice our nervous system in such ways, we can start to reframe prolonged stress. If we saw it in a light of personal failure, we can shift more into physiology, as we see that we have simply adapted to what we've been living through. Our nervous system does what it can to protect us, and supports us so that we can keep on going. Sometimes it happens to get stuck or to overcorrect, but it's what it does independently of our character.

It’s part of us being human.

Experience has shaped our nervous system. And experience can reshape it. We can start by understanding what is happening within us, approaching it with curiosity, without judgment, without blame, and without the pressure to “fix” anything quickly.

Dom

Integrative Counsellor (Trauma‑Informed)

Specialising in Trauma, ADHD, Narcissistic Abuse, Burnout, PTSD/CPTSD and Moral Injury

Practising in Malvern, Hereford, and Online